Machado de Assis — Chapter 3: An erased marginal note in a late-century ledger — Novella Movement 2
Chapter III: The Note in the Margin
Reader, before you sit down in that chair — the one with the worn arm, where three other confidants of mine have already dozed off before finishing the second page — let me warn you that this chapter promises nothing. It opens a door; it does not walk you through the house. Later chapters, if God and the printer allow them, will do that service. For now I ask only your patience, which costs you nothing, and your suspicion, which costs you a little more, since suspicion is the coin I deal in and I would rather you spent it wisely than saved it for some other author.
I was sixty-one years old, retired from the notarial trade, and had taken up, as men of leisure often do, the habit of walking without destination through the lower streets of the city, examining doorways, reading the plaques of vanished commercial houses, calculating in my head how many of them owed their ruin to fire, how many to fashion, and how many, though this is harder to prove, to a wife. It was in one such house, once the counting-rooms of the firm of Andrade & Cordovil, dealers in dry goods and occasional confidence, that I came upon the ledger.
The building had been sold to a society of antiquarians who meant to convert it into a museum of commerce, an idea as Brazilian as it is doomed; they wanted an old notary's eye to certify what was genuine among the account books and what was forged by nostalgia. I obliged them, less from vanity than from curiosity, two vices that in a man past sixty amount to the same thing.
The ledger for the year 1877 lay open at folio forty-two, and there, beside an entry recording the sale of nine pieces of French cambric to a certain customer whose name had been written and then, with evident care, scraped away with a blade — not crossed out, which is the coward's erasure, but shaved from the paper itself, leaving a pale wound where the fiber had thinned — there had once been a marginal note. Of the note only three letters survived, an "e," an "o," and what might have been the tail of a "q," arranged in a manner that suggested, without confirming, the word esposo. Husband. Or perhaps esposa. Wife. The blade had not troubled to distinguish between them, and neither, forty years later, did I.
I confess I stood before that page longer than an antiquarian's commission required. A note is written for a purpose; it is erased for a better one. Between those two purposes lies the whole of human conduct, and I had spent thirty years drawing up wills and contracts without once suspecting that the interesting part of a document is never the clause but the deletion.
"You find something of value, Conselheiro?" This from young Deolindo, the antiquarians' secretary, a clerk of perhaps twenty-six years, quick of eye, cheap of coat, who had attached himself to me that morning with the particular warmth reserved by young men for old men who might be useful to them.
"I find a curiosity," I said. "Nothing more."
"They say," he ventured, lowering his voice as though the dead firm's ghosts might object, "that Senhor Cordovil kept that book locked after his wife's death, and that no clerk was permitted to touch folio forty-two."
I did not ask him how he came to know what no clerk was permitted to know. Some ignorances are more useful maintained than corrected, and Deolindo, I already suspected, was the sort of young man who supplies information the way certain merchants supply weight to the scale — generously, and always in his own favor.
Let me confess, since we are being modern about our confessions this year, that my own house now keeps a better ledger than Cordovil's ever was. My grand-nephew, home from his studies in electrical philosophy, has fixed to the wall of my hallway a small glass eye, no larger than a coat button, which he assures me records the comings and goings of the house upon a memory of silver and light, and never scratches out a name, never shaves a syllable from its page. He calls it a sentinel; I call it an informer with excellent manners. It occurs to me that Cordovil would have paid any sum for such a device, and that I, forty years ago, might have paid more.
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But this is to run ahead of the ledger, and of the year 1877, and of a name that was there and is not there, which — you will agree, reader, whether you are hostile or merely patient — deserves a chapter of its own; and it shall have one, though not, for reasons of economy and of conscience, this one.
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This one belongs, instead, to Deolindo, who returned three days later, as I had calculated he would, though I had not calculated on the price. He came with a manila envelope, a manner considerably more solemn than his coat deserved, and a story he had, he said, from the old porter of the building, who had it from his mother, who had scrubbed the floors of the Cordovil house for eleven years and buried more of its secrets than she ever swept out.
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The story, reduced to its accounting essentials, was this: Cordovil's wife had taken, in the year 1877, a lover among the firm's correspondents, a dealer in Portuguese wines named — and here Deolindo lowered his voice to the register young men reserve for scandal and confession plates alike — Bastos. Cordovil, discovering the note his own clerk had written in the margin, out of some clerkish pleasantry or clerkish malice, had not confronted his wife; he had taken a penknife to the page instead, as though the paper were the sin and not merely its register. She died the following spring, of a fever the porter's mother called suspicious and the parish register called ordinary. Cordovil lived nine years more, locked the ledger in a drawer, and left instructions that folio forty-two be burned with him. The instructions, evidently, had not been honored; ledgers, unlike men, decline to be buried on request.
I paid Deolindo four mil-réis for the story, which is to say I paid him for a version of the truth cut to fit my curiosity, as a tailor cuts cloth to fit a customer he has never measured. He left satisfied; I remained, as a retired notary should, unconvinced. A husband jealous enough to take a blade to paper is not always a husband who has cause; he is sometimes only a husband who has read too many margins in his life and trusted none of them, a vice I recognized the way one recognizes, in another man's coat, the cut of one's own tailor.
I did not pursue Bastos, if Bastos existed; I did not visit the parish register to test the porter's mother against the priest's Latin. Some inquiries are better left where the reader may finish them alone, at his own table, with his own suspicions for company; and I had, besides, an appointment that afternoon with my grand-nephew, who wished to show me an improvement to his glass sentinel — a faculty, he said, of recording not only who passed beneath it but at what hour, and for how long they lingered, which struck me as either the perfection of the ledger or its final degradation, and I have not yet decided which, nor do I think the distinction matters to the machine.
"It never forgets," he told me, with the pride young men reserve for inventions that will outlive their inventors' patience. I told him that Cordovil's ledger had not forgotten either; it had merely been persuaded, with a blade and nine years of silence, to hold its tongue. My grand-nephew laughed, thinking I had made a joke. Let him think it.
That evening I sat down to write these pages, and found, upon rereading what I had set to paper concerning folio forty-two, that I too had shaved something from the margin — not with a blade, which I do not own, but with the discretion an old notary reserves for facts he cannot certify. I have not told you whether I believe Deolindo's four-mil-réis history, and I do not intend to; a man who has drawn up wills for thirty years learns that belief, like a signature, should never be given before the document is entirely read, and this document, reader, is not entire, nor do I promise you the folio that would complete it.
The antiquarians have since closed the museum of commerce for want of subscribers, a fate as Brazilian as its opening; the ledger, I am told, was sold with the other fixtures to a collector in Petrópolis who wanted it for the binding and not the ink. Somewhere between his shelf and my hallway sentinel, an entire century of erasures continues, unwitnessed, uncertified — and it occurs to me only now, closing this chapter as I open no other, that the machine on my wall, for all its silver memory, has never once recorded a motive, only a passage; which is, now that I set it down, very much what my thirty years of notarial practice amounted to as well.